Saturday, October 6, 2007

1981 Topps Tournament -- Semifinal, Match 2

Seed #3 Ellis Valentine (#445) VS. Seed #2 Dennis Eckersley (#620)


The classic philosophical struggles are embodied in this matchup. Nature versus technology; man versus machine; hairspray versus gel.

In the green corner you have Ellis Valentine (who scored an easy victory in the quarterfinal round, 5-2), a soldier sent from the future to put things right that once went wrong, like Scott Bakula. Equipped with a laser-tipped, digitally enhanced, liquid-metal face shield, he battles strong monsters on behalf of his NationCorp, ELB.

In the red corner you have Dennis Eckersley (who tied with his last opponent 3-3, yet advanced because of his higher seed), sent from the past, unselfishly abandoning his brethren of the round table, cloaking himself in the red of St. George's cross. His dragon-slaying lance is replaced with the mythical Comb of Walgreen's.

The battle is fierce, my friends. Valentine has several batting doughnuts at his disposal, yet Eckersley has been able to woo the young, mostly female crowd, issues of Tiger Beat clutched firmly in hand.

Who will it be? Who is worthy? Vote your conscience.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

One for Ellis Valentine...he is a symbol of man's contempt for nature. Is contempt the word I'm looking for? Hmm, yeah, sure.

~Kevin

--David said...

Probably the hardest decision yet... As much as it pains me to turn my back on Ecks, I have to go with Valentine, the sabre-toothed wonder...

Steve said...

Is that a photo locket around your neck, Sir Dennis? You get my vote.

Bay Rat North West said...

Eck's hair should have been featured on That's Incredible! Valentines flosser has no effect on Dennis. So Mr. Eckersly - you are not eliminated! At least by me.

bailorg said...

Tough vote for me since I didn't vote for either of these cards in the previous round.

I'll vote for Valentine, just for sheer freakiness over Eck's polished looks.

dayf said...

Hmmm... the battle for the right to get demolished by Hrabosky. Eck's hair is no match for the stare. Ellis at least has a mutant helmet and a bat to try to defend himself. Ellis Valentine.