Wednesday, February 13, 2008

So I Bought Some Cards From These Two Girls...

Alright, let me start off by explaining that I fully realize how this is just a big scam. I bought these from a seller claiming to be a couple of girls, one of whom just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her. Her recourse? Sell off all of his cards and keep the profits!

Not too long ago a large package arrived at my door. Inside, a couple of stacks of cards from a variety of years awaited my inspection. I was just hoping I didn't get totally screwed.

From these two stacks, I've plucked out a C. Montgomery Burns "local nine" from each. You'll see that there's some modest success, but nothing to write home about. Also keep in mind that I'm going with a "got it/don't got it" rationale for these choices.

Stack A:
1984 Topps Tony Gwynn
1989 Score Cal Ripken, Jr.
1987 Fleer Headliner Keith Hernandez
1988 Topps Jerry Rice Record Breaker
1989 Topps Ryne Sandberg
1996 Fleer Ultra Barry Bonds Season Crowns
1983 Topps Walter Payton
2006 Donruss Classics Legend Johnny Unitas (0737/1000)
1994 Topps Finest Ken Griffey, Jr. (This one is the most intriguing of the lot, as this card has a blank back. I am not too familiar with this set, so maybe someone could fill me in?)

Stack B:
1989 Donruss Cal Ripken, Jr.
1987 Donruss Reggie Jackson
1995 Fleer Ultra Manny Ramirez Fresh Foundations
1988 Donruss Mark McGwire
1986 Topps Paul Molitor
1988 Topps Mark McGwire
1992 O-Pee-Chee Kevin Reimer (Not a good card by any means, but interesting to see an O-Pee-Chee.)
1988 Donruss Cal Ripken, Jr.

From the looks of it, Stack B is getting spanked. But wait, it looks like there's only eight! Who's that encased in plastic?

A 1995 Alex Rodriguez Score Rookie Dream Team. Schweet!
I guess that just about evens things out, don't it.

Oh, yeah, and there's also this:

Yes, included in the lot was a 5x7 original photo, printed on Fuji paper. Please note that I was not the one who cropped the faces out.

Would I buy from these "girls" again? Probably not, but I feel like it's my duty to report on current trends in the hobby. Which begs the question...Why do auto shows, a guy-oriented undertaking, include this type of partially-clothed element, whereas card shows do not? Will this oversight be remedied? Only time will tell.

Seriously, someone let me know what the deal is with that Griffey.
And I shit you not, I expect the comments on this post to be hilarious. Nothing is out of bounds, not even the smaller girl's choice in nail polish colors. Get crackin'!


dayf said...

Geez, I'm glad my wife wasn't in the room when I pulled up this post...

Where the HELL do you find this stuff? I'm in a bitchy mood right now so I'm not going to be good at the snark, but the Griffey finest iss 1994 and the A-Rod card is from 1995 Score. My 6 year old SCD books the A-Rod at 25 bucks and doesn't say anything about the blank backed Griffey. Printer's error maybe?

White Sox Cards said...

Not too bad of a selection. It's a lot better than it could be. I am glad Tracey wasn't over for this post.

These must be magical girls. Their underwear changs from black when viewed from the back to the colors of rainbow sherbet when viewed from the front.

I thought O-Pee-Chee stopped using Topps design before this.

Did these girls steal the last pack of Donruss Americana and replace it with the Griffey and the A-Rod? I think they are shifty shape-changers.

Chris Harris said...

2 girls, 1 pack? (of cards)

Get it?



I got nuttin'

dayf said...

If the back was 1990 Fleer, it would be more repulsive than the original.

--David said...

I'm sure there's a "HEAD"-liner joke in here somewhere... Seriously, though, is it the scan or do those chicks have serious vericose veins going on there?

William said...

Here's the deal. Kevin Reimer boned these two broads in a promiscuously anonymous three-way and they've been ashamed to show their faces since then. To make matters worse, Gino Petralli filmed it and Scott Chiamparino once pleasured himself to said film.

Either that or it's just a scam and some geek used these two random girls as a front to get dudes to buy cards.

AlbuqwirkE said...

Hey, I thought I was missing some cards!!!!

Big Daddy Filth said...

Proof fellas leave your cards at home, better for mom to throw out then for the skanky ex to sell!!