Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Nightmares on Cardboard 2008 -- Third Place

So I suppose I've teased this contest long enough, and it's time to deliver the goods. Response was tepid, but the quality of what I received from my first annual Halloween Scary Card Contest was unbelievable. People with more skill and time than I would have ever imagined sent in entries that outdid the majority of the offerings from major card companies this year. (I'm looking in your direction, Upper Deck. Two politicians fighting on a baseball field = lame.)

To be brutally honest, only three hardcore fans entered the contest. With each entry I received, I loudly exclaimed, "This one has to be the winner, no contest!" To assign tonight's card third place, then, was a Heartbreaking Decision of Staggering Contemplation. I truly feel bad that this one gets the white ribbon. It comes from Matt, proprietor of a card blog smart enough to take its name from a book smart enough to have included rudimentary blueprint schematics of a house's floor plan wherein the author and his little brother/surrogate son ran and slid on the hardwood floors in stocking feet. Yes, that is a long sentence. Here.

2008 Upper Deck A Piece of History Body Cuts -- Kimbo Slice

The card was extremely timely, with Kimbo's imminent Elite XC loss occurring on October 4. I've made reference before to the eventuality of swatches of skidmarked undies and epithelial cells one day making their way onto cards. Finding this card in a pack would inspire fear the likes of which this world has not yet seen.

If the scan is too hard to read, here is the transcript from the back:
"CONGRATULATIONS!
You have received a trading card with an historical blood splatter of Kimbo Slice's blood. The splatter was certified to us as being beaten out of Kimbo Slice. We hope you enjoy this piece of history as we continue to take you uncomfortably close to history!"

Shout outs to Matt for having the foresight to use a double-thick pack decoy on which to mount his image, making this feel like a real card. This is a card with which I will never part, as it is truly one-of-a-kind.

Second place tomorrow, unless report cards bog me down! All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

5 comments:

Cardboard Addiction said...

If that was a real card, I would have to have it! Awesome job.

--David said...

Man, that is fantastic! what a great idea!

dayf said...

Heh, nice! better than a hair card.

PunkRockPaint said...

Sweet! Is it real blood?

I was tempted to make a card that would squirt "blood" when you held it... Unfortunately, I couldn't figure out how to keep it from hemorrhaging in the envelope.

dinged corners said...

aaaugh! (in a good way)