Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Cal Ripken Sighting!

This week my class started a new social studies unit, which was introduced in the textbook with a story called City Green. The barebones plot of the story is as follows: A group of concerned citizens wants to do something about the vacant lot that has become an eyesore in their neighborhood. To hasten the gentrification process, they traipse down to city hall, pay the $1.00 fee for the required permits, take over the vacant lot, and work together to clean it up. Basically the story is used to introduce the students to concepts related to working together in a community, such as voting and petition writing. As you can see from the opening page, citizens from all walks of life band together to ensure that the urban blight moves to another taxpayer's neighborhood. Let's take a closer look at who's putting their urban renewal know-how to work.

You've got retirees...

...Amish hackysackers...

...even Sarah Jessica Parker!

After all of the bureaucratic hoops are jumped through, more and more people start pitching in and/or fulfilling community service sentencing requirements. As this illustration clearly shows, volunteerism is not limited to one select group of individuals. Rather, a diverse group shows up to lend a hand, including...

...portly widows on cookie baking break...

...divorcees with restraining orders against them...

...Communists...

...cripples...

...people with hearing impairments...

...and even illegal aliens. Nice.

The story's major antagonist is Old Man Hammer, a cantankerous old bastard who gets his jollies from shitting all over everyone else's proactive ideas and can-do spirit. A lot of fist-shaking ensues.

Later on in the story is where the inspiration for this post appears. Popping out of nowhere, Orioles superstar Cal Ripken, Jr. arrives on the scene to help. The author goes out of her way to keep this cameo very hush-hush, declining to even mention in the text that the action is set in Baltimore.

The casual reader may have been fooled by the somewhat shorter stature and the weekend tan Cal just earned while putting a new roof on his house in the hot sun, but rest assured, it's him. That cap can't fool anybody.

And that's a retired jersey that no other Orioles are allowed to wear. Don't be such a skeptic, not to mention a hater.


Awww, I feel bad now about not giving you a real Cal card for you to see. Here's the most recent one I've pulled. He's paired up with another guy who was an okay ballplayer, too.
2007 Upper Deck #CRTG7 Cal Ripken, Jr. and Tony Gwynn Road to the Hall

Perhaps this break in the action gives you a preview about who my next Trade Me Anything trade is from.

1 comment:

PunkRockPaint said...

If you decide to part with that card... I would cherish the right half of it. :)