Tuesday, February 9, 2010

A Bipping to End All Bippings

I suppose I always knew it would come to this. One day will become the next. The seasons will change, autumn upon summer, then winter upon autumn. The sun, yes, will rise. But this world will never know a Bipping such as this. Watch.
(No really, watch the whole thing.)

If you were counting along with me, that was 210 1989 Topps Dave Gallagher cards.

Two.
Hundred.
Ten.


They came a couple of weeks ago from the Mad Guru. Apparently I was so shell shocked that it took me this long to recover. The Bipping dosage was so high that I am now radioactive. Truly, that was an unsafe amount of card, and should have been properly labeled with a biohazard sticker.

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attempt a Bipping on such a scale. You are putting lives in danger. If you need a different sort of visual, here is the stack of all 210 Gallaghers. It's almost as tall as a Southland Tales Blu-Ray case.

Any chance of Dave Gallagher making a baseball comeback? Yeah, I don't think so either. At least the Dan Plesac mini-Bip the Guru sent will provide some sort of comfort.

(Editor's Note: The above video is actually the backup to Thorzul's first choice. YouTube took issue with some of the music the original cut included. Very important, since the two hundred or so views of this video really would have cut into sales of Geoff Muldaur's "Brazil." Bitches.)

11 comments:

Community Gum said...

It would have been great if you opened the door at the end to find Dave Gallagher himself hand you the last card. Not like he's doing anything.

Please tell me you own Southland Tales for kitsch appeal.

BA Benny said...

That is one hell of a bipping. That dude should be on America's Most Wanted.

night owl said...

Who has 210 Dave Gallaghers to send? I think Gallagher might have a stalker.

Damn, somebody better check and see if he's alive. Maybe you just got mailed evidence.

Wickedliquids said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA bipping on the most epic scale!

Rod said...

It just needs a rick astley soundtrack. I haven't even dug into all my bip roberts cards to do an actual bipping

Mad Guru said...

Sadly, those Gallaghers were acquired with the idea that they might potentially be worth something upon his induction to the Hall of Fame and I could buy a house in Boca Raton or something. I always overvalue defense by an awful lot.

Roy said...

It should take at least 209 more Miller Lites to get over that one.

dogfacedgremlin said...

Since he already has 210 of these, I say the rest of the blog world send him the same card if they have it. Let's see how long it takes to hit 1000.

PunkRockPaint said...

"It would have been great if you opened the door at the end to find Dave Gallagher himself hand you the last card." I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING!!!

" I say the rest of the blog world send him the same card if they have it. Let's see how long it takes to hit 1000." I can NOT go back through the 89 Topps box again! Good Bipping material was culled from there though...

Rod: Save your Bip searching... You may have a package coming.

Jeffrey Wolfe said...

Early candidate for card video of the year. Shame YouTube ganked the music. You should reupload it with a diffrent song.

Paul said...

A few of us are on the frequency with this post, especially having Gallagher at the front door.

As I first started watching this, I was thinking, "It's like a Family Circus" comic gone horribly wrong. You know the ones where you follow the dotted lines of the movements of the kids.

Another thing I thought of was when the TV was turned on, there would be a large picture of one of the cards.

This was epic.