Monday, March 5, 2012

The Wire: SMACKETOLOGY Day 1

Over on Grantland (which you should be reading, by the way) they're hosting a Smacketology NCAA-style bracket to determine once and for all who the best character on HBO's The Wire is. The first round results of the top half of the bracket will be posted tomorrow, and I'd like to weigh in before they're published.

MY PERSONAL PICKS
WEST BALTIMORE REGION
Omar Little (#1) over Ziggy Sobotka (#8)
No-brainer, Omar should coast to the Final Four without a hiccup.

Dennis "Cutty" Wise (#5) over Chris Partlow (#4)
Cutty showed how redemption was possible. Starting a youth boxing gym is no joke.

D'Angelo Barksdale (#6) over Snoop Pearson (#3)
D'Angelo ran shit, had a fly girl, and made it look like he was middle class. Snoop looked like a dude. Advantage: D.

"Cheese" Wagstaff (#7) over Michael Lee (#2)
All Michael Lee ever did was make sure the shorties had drink boxes and Lunchables before they went to school. No way he beats Method Man.


THE PORTS REGION
Roland Pryzbylewski (#8) over Avon Barksdale (#1)
Prez in a HUGE UPSET! Avon ran things for some time, but was little more than a stock character. Prez let his students shoot dice to learn math and he punched out a police captain. Plus, motherfucker could break any code known to man.

Tommy Carcetti (#4) over Duquan "Dukie" Weems (#5)
You gotta give Dukie credit for coming to school every day smelling like shit. But give Carcetti more credit for turning down the sexual advances of his campaign manager.

"Bunny" Colvin (#3) over "Serge" Malatov (#6)
One word: Hamsterdam.

"Prop" Joe Stewart (#2) over Frank Sobotka (#7)
I hate to fail to back a good union man, but Prop Joe could fix the shit out of a toaster. Was it just me, or was he tinkering with a small electric appliance during every drug deal and stickup thwarting?

I hope you enjoyed these random musings from a viewer two years removed from watching his last episode. I'll be curious to see how well these turn out. Debate is welcome in the comments.

2 comments:

Nick B. said...

The Hamstersdam Region is loaded!! Who seeded this? Omar walks right into the Final Four, whistling "Farmer in the Dell" the whole time. I'm cheering for Freeman to make a run, but Marlo is going to be s tough match-up.

sruchris said...

At a seven seed, Bubs is very underrated. With or without the Barksdale crew, Bodie, who never messed up a count, won't fold easily. Without any muscle, Marlo loses in the first round as his name no longer rings out. Joe, who easily runs the Ports region, knows the game better than anyone else.

My final four picks:

Omar v. Bubs
Joe v. Bodie


Championship:

Bubs defeats Bodie