Wednesday, July 31, 2013

With an Iron Fist: A 2008 Allen & Ginter Insert Revisited

Not too long ago I bought a big lot of mini cards from different sets. These were mostly Allen & Ginter cards from different years, with a little bit of Topps 206 and UD Goodwin thrown in. Kind of an odd purchase, since I'm not actively trying to finish any mini set in particular, but the price and quantity were right. As I was filing these away, I came across a small stack of World Leaders minis from '08 Ginter I had stashed away. I don't think I completed much of the base set, much less any of the mini inserts. They were just sitting in an empty '08 Heritage box with the cover cut off, taunting me.

The geopolitical landscape is an ever-shifting one. Here in the good old U.S. of A., we've had two presidential elections since the release of this set. Seeing these old friends made me wonder what became of this group of leaders representing a small fraction of the 50-card set. Now is the right time for an update.

Name: Stephen Harper
Nation: Canada
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: Yes
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Abandoned most of his 2011 campaign promises in order to turn his attention to a much-maligned effort to resurrect FoxTrax for all televised NHL games played on Canadian ice.


Name: Nicolas Sarkozy
Nation: France
Title: President
Still in Power?: No
Successor: François Hollande
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: While in office, attempted to change name of political party to Union pour un Franken de Baie Populaire, further alienating Le Comte de Chocula separatist movement. Boo Berry radicals still refuse to recognize Sarkozy's presidency.


Name: Yahya A.J.J. Jammeh
Nation: The Gambia
Title: President
Still in Power?: Yes
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Significant and numerous human rights abuses followed by stunningly unpopular hat tariffs.


Name: Geir H. Haarde
Nation: Iceland
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: No
Successor: Jóhanna Sigurðardóttir
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Responsible for withholding several volumes' worth of rare Sugarcubes B-sides and outtakes; Holds patent rights to Snoopy's Sno-Cone Machine, ensuring that they will never work quite as well as they should.


Name: Yasuo Fukuda
Nation: Japan
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: No
Successor: Taro Aso
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Short-tempered would often respond to hearing his name called with a fiery, "Fuk-ME-da??? Fuk-YOU-da!!!" No matter how hard he tried, would never be as cool as this awesome motherfucker.


Name: Jan Peter Balkendde
Nation: Netherlands
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: No
Successor: Mark Rutte
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Strict enforcement of women's field hockey national team's minimum skirt length throughout entire term; Failed attempt to ram legislation through parliament which would have forced Amsterdam movie theatre owners to serve beer in paper cups rather than glasses.


Name: Helen Clark
Nation: New Zealand
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: No
Successor: John Key
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Led break-in at Upper Deck's Southern Hemisphere Headquarters, igniting rumors that the company's 2008 women's netball set was infringing upon the 1961 Topps design.


Name: Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo
Nation: Philippines
Title: President
Still in Power?: No
Successor: Benigno Aquino III
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Hoarding both vowels and consonants in an underground state-sanctioned reserve; Steadfast refusal to lend active military personnel and/or vehicles to any Roger Corman production.


Name: Nguyen Tan Dung
Nation: Vitenam
Title: Prime Minister
Still in Power?: Yes
Crime(s) Against Humanity as Leader: Signed bill into law requiring that all currency bear the inscription, "Me love you long time," replacing the motto, "Độc lập – Tự do – Hạnh phúc" ("Independence - Freedom - Happiness").

2 comments:

the sewingmachineguy said...

History is exciting! Can't believe there are no comments here!
What day is it?
Hope you and the fam are well.
Peace, Larry the smg

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